I’m going to keep this short and sweet.
"Heroes shouldn’t have happy personal lives. They are committed to being that person and committed to defending others at the sacrifice of their own personal interests.”
“That’s very important and something we reinforced,” he continued. … It’s wonderful that they try to establish personal lives, but it’s equally important that they set them aside. That is our mandate, that is our edict and that is our stand.”—-Dan Didio, Baltimore Comic Con in response the anti-marriage edict at DC Comics
Bullshit. Cowardice. Limited. Immature. Depressing. Fundamentally insulting and wrong.
It’s an insulting view on what makes a person a true hero.
Our world is filled with people—-no matter their sexual orientation—-who make great sacrifices for other people and who put others needs before their own. Some of those people choose to remain single. But many of those men and women have made the choice to be with the person they love. Many of them are married or would CHOOSE to be married if our government would grant them true equality—-and many of them have children.
Our police officers. Our firefighters. The men and women—both gay and straight—-of our armed forces. These people are true heroes.
To imply that the only way that a person can truly commit to a heroic journey is to be denied any kind of satisfaction in their personal life is at best, deeply immature and, at worst, deeply insulting to the people who actually do save lives every single day and who do it knowing full well that when duty calls…they have to go….even if it means that it’s difficult to leave the people they love to do so.
To imply that it’s not possible to sustain good, entertaining, exciting drama while also exploring healthy, long term relationships is immature and limiting. It reeks of a Peter Pan complex and an immature emotional mindset about sex, love and commitment. It reeks of an industry that continues to coddle this idea that men should never really grow up.
I don’t read about heroes to be depressed. I read about them to be inspired. Part of that inspiration is the idea that yes….it’s possible to take a risk on love. To not live in fear. That even though you might be risking everything….that love can be worth the risk. I believe in love. I believe that love is worth the risk and I believe that the world’s greatest heroes—-particularly the heroes that are supposed to be bringing us hope—-would also be courageous enough to stand up and fight for love as opposed to living in fear.
It was immature cowardice when they gutted the Supermarriage as opposing to having the courage to actually put mature writers on the book. It was cowardice when they re-wrote the Flash marriage. It’s cowardice now with Kate and Maggie with an added bonus of being completely tone deaf and insensitive to what a marriage between two women would mean to people on the page. It’s not inspiring. It’s not mature. It’s not exciting.
So if your goal was to tell “exciting” stories…Congrats. You failed. This is not exciting. This is childish Peter Pan bullshit.
seriously Didio, what the fuck
People need something to inspire that level of dedication and it is not going to be everyone for whom the faceless masses does it. It’s going to be the people they love that inspire them to that level of ddication. And if your answer to that is going to be to continually rip any happiness away from them you are going to create either villains or people who have lost too much to be willing to act anymore.
Fuck this shit. I’m gonna cry.
This is the exact opposite of why we love superhero comics, science fiction, fantasy and all of our cherished geeky stuff. He’s missing the point of his medium. We love our heroes exactly because we enjoy reading about them balancing their families, friends, spouses with the rest of their lives they dedicated to what they do. These things are equally as important to the readers as them fighting the good fight, and what’s more, anyone who’s ever cared for a character knows full well that you need to see them have a range of emotions to give a crap. God knows I love my Batman, but if he were only about punching shit, I wouldn’t give a fuck.
Buffy without her friendships, without her everyday struggles to be just Buffy and be the Slayer? Boring. Mulder and Scully being only about the aliens? Nothing interesting about it. Aang without the Gaang, without their stories and their support? Empty.
Superman without his parents, without Lois? Batman taking interns instead of finding a family of his own? New 52.
The people we read in literature are supposed to be our role models. They are the people that can do amazing feats and save lives. They experience pain and hardship and heartbreak.
But they are our role models. And if they can’t have happy lives despite the hardships they face, who is there to show us, the readers, the people who may struggle everyday with trying to smile, with trying to make it through the everyday hardships, the people who are trying to see that there may be happiness on the other side of the shit they are going through.
If superheroes can’t have happiness, then how are we supposed to believe that the everyday heroes can have it, too? How are we supposed to believe that if we just put down the knife we may be happy in the future?
I LIKE reading about happy relationships…and watching shows with them in…and it bugs me so much that couples are only ‘interesting’ if something terrible eventually happens or if they’re cheating on each other or breaking up…
Well written happy couples ARE interesting…and you can tell tons of interesting, awesome stories with a character who is in a happy relationship with the one they love…
I LOVE that Kate and Maggie are a happy couple…I love that they want to be together, that they want to make their relationship work, that they don’t give up on their love for each other…their scenes together and seeing their relationship progress has been my favourite thing about the series
I would rather read about that than read stories where Kate is miserable and unhappy and can’t have a real relationship because she’s Batwoman…because that’s just angsty garbage…
Stories where Kate and the woman she love are together, as a couple that loves each other, that’s there for each other, that cares about each other more than anything else…that’s what I want to read about <3